Changes
by Sweetheart91597
Summary: Post-Reichenbach: When Sherlock returns, he expects everything to be exactly the way he left it... But a lot can change in one year... I don't own Sherlock. Thanks to all my readers! 995 viewers :) Thanks for the support! :) Check out the poll on my profile page!
1. Tears and tackles

_1 year after the Reichenbach fall _

Sherlock's POV

I still can see John standing in front of my 'grave'. I still can hear him talking to 'me'.  
It took all of my willpower that day at the graveyard to not just run up to him and tell him everything  
But I couldn't. I couldn't risk him getting hurt… or worse.

Today is the day. Today, exactly one year later, I'm going to see him again. He will be very emotional, I think. Maybe start crying or something. But I can't really handle emotions, so there's a probability that I might be wrong.

But John isn't the only one I tricked. Lestrade, Miss Hudson,… I even managed to trick Mycroft!  
I know I should feel bad about that, but I'm actually quite proud of myself that I managed to escape from his network.  
I got Mycroft Holmes to show emotions. There has got to be a sort of award for that!

I already went to Miss Hudson and Lestrade. Miss Hudson dropped her teapot, yelled a little at me, hit me a couple of times (you would be surprised about her strength!) and then she started crying.  
I hugged her, but didn't say a thing myself. I couldn't find the right words to explain what I did.  
And more importantly, why I did it. So I just hugged her.  
Then I went to Scotland Yard. The looks on their faces! Like they had seen a ghost or something…  
Ok, bad choice of words.  
When I nocked at Lestrade's office, he didn't reply at first. Probably was in a meeting. I smirked. Terrific! I walked into the room and indeed: Lestrade was sitting behind his desk. In front of him: Anderson and Donnovan. This day just got ten times better!  
'What… the…' That was all Anderson said. I don't know how much of his brain cells it took him to come up with that.  
Sally just stared. But I thought that she didn't was so pale when I left. Strange…  
Lestrade stood up and walked over to me. When he was right in front of me, he stood still. He reached out to touch my shoulder. When he actually could touch it, he jumped back a little from surprise. I couldn't help but smile at this reaction.  
Then, he did something I wouldn't have expected me to do.

He tackled me to the ground! And he pinned me down! At that point, both Anderson and Donnovan burst out in laughter. I tried to get loose, but Lestrade was a quiet strong man for his height. 'Lestrade', I managed to say 'It's me. Sherlock Holmes. Don't you remember me?' 'Oh, I remember you, already' Lestrade answered 'You were the guy that left us all of a sudden. And clearly, you faked that! So once again, we are the idiots and you the genius Congratulations' All of this was said with a voice filled with anger. I actually got scared. If this was Lestrade's reaction, what would John's be?!

After a couple of minutes, he stood back up and then pulled me up as well. When we were back on our feet, he sighed. 'I had always wanted to do that!' He said with a small smirk on his face. I also gave him a little smile.  
He ordered Anderson and Donnovan to leave and asked me to sit down. 'So', he said 'how did John react? Did he punch you in the face?' He smiled at that last part. I kept quiet and looked at the carpet. Hmm, new colour… 'Oh no' Lestrade said a little scared 'Don't tell me you came here before you went to John?' When I didn't respond, he got his answer.  
'Sherlock! He was devastated! Even after an entire year, he can't say your name properly without feeling guilty!' Now I was the one who was surprised. 'How so guilty' I asked. '… He blamed himself for your suicide' Lestrade answered. My eyes grew big. 'He said that he must me a terrible friend', Lestrade continued 'if you hadn't trusted him enough to let him in on how you were feeling. He moved out two weeks after the… incident. He wasn't able to live with all the memories. But Mycroft kept paying the rent. So at the moment, I think that your apartment is still empty'  
Once again, I was dumbfounded. Mycroft didn't know I was still alive. So why did he keep paying the rent? Although money had never been a problem for him, he WAS the British government, he wouldn't give it away for no apparent reason.  
Sentiment?  
Could it be?  
No, not his brother!  
Not the man who practically could start a war with one text.  
Not that guy!

Right?

**Author's note: I know Sherlock's return had been done so many times before. But I still want to give it a shot. Let me know what you think! Review, send me a message,…  
Already: thanks a lot for reading! :D **


	2. Suprise and emotions

Sherlock's POV

After the strange meeting with Lestrade, I went to my 'beloved brother'.  
Even after an entire year, I still could barely believe that I actually had managed to escape from his network! Nobody could do that! Mycroft Holmes was the most powerfull man in the country!  
He WAS the Brtitisch government. He could follow your moves precisely from behind his desk while controlling the security cameras in the street.

I walked into the building where Mycroft's office was. When I entered, everyone in the lobby gave my weird looks. You could almost here them thinking: _Wasn't he dead? _

I had walked this path so many times. The elevator to the 5th floor, then the end of the hallway.  
I stopped in front of the door. Normally, I would burst into this office and just put myself down in the cosy armchair on the other side of his desk and Mycroft would just look up and continue his work.  
How many times he hadn't asked to knock before I entered…  
I decided that I had to make up something, so I did what he always had wanted me to do.

I knocked. I heard him call 'Come in'. How I had missed his annoying voice…  
You only know what you have when you lose it.  
If someone had told me last year that I would start to miss my older brother, I would have called hi man idiot and continued life. But now…

I hesitated a little and then entered his office.

Mycroft was sitting behind his desk with his legs crossed. On his lap a file. Probably some sort of Arabian country that was going to start a war.  
I closed the door behind me and just stood there, waiting for him to look up before I talked.

After a little while, Mycroft sighed and looked up. When he looked me in the eyes, he dropped the file he was holding and just sat there. His brown eyes big from suprise.  
Then he was back to his normal , controlled self. 'I see you have returned from the death' It wasn't a question, just a statement.

I sighed. _Remind me again why I missed him? _'Yes', I answered.  
Then, their was an akward silence. None of us had ever been in a situation like this. Not knowing what to say was very uncommon for our family. Then, Mycroft talked again: 'So, how did John react?' He bended a little to pick up the file from the ground.

Then, I got angry. His only brother had been gone for a year and all he said was 'I see you have returned from the death'?! That was rude, even for me!  
'Thats all you can say?!' I yelled suddenly 'I have been dead for a year! The least you could do is shake my hand!'  
Mycroft stood back up and put his papers on his desk. He leaned on his desk before looking back up. There was something in his eyes, but I couldn't say what it was.  
Something that came evry close to… emotion? No, Mycroft didn't do 'emotions'. He was to straight forward for that. Right?

Then he walked up to me and just stood in front of me for a moment.  
Then, he placed his hands on my shoulders and squeezed them a little.  
I was genuinely startled. I know I asked him to do something, but I didn't expect him to actually listen to me!  
Then, he smiled: 'Welcome back' He whispered.

I smiled and my eyes got a little teary. Must be a lot of dust around here…  
Then Mycroft let go and sat on his desk. He motioned for me to take place in the armchair across him. I sat down and looked up at him (literally).

'So, how did John take your return?' Mycroft asked with a small smile in his lips 'I see he hasn't broken your nose… yet' I looked at the bookcase behind him. He really should sort his books on author… 'Sherlock, you must be kidding me!' He said suddenly 'Don't tell me…' I looked him in the eyes with a lost look. 'O no…' He answered a little scared 'You haven't told him! Even I know that you should have gone to him before you came here!'  
'… I couldn't. I didn't know what to say…' There was nothing else I could say. I was afraid that if I said another word, I would break down.

Clearly, Mycroft felt that to. He stood up from his desk and looked at his watch. 'I wanted to go to John anyway today. Just to see how he was doing on the anniversary of your death. Care to join me?' I looked him in the eyes.  
For a second, I saw us as little kids. For just a moment, he was the big brother again that comforted me when our parents didn't have any time.

Then, the moment was over. But it had been there. And I would never forget it. The moment was safely stored in my mind palace.  
I smiled at him: 'Thank you'  
He just winked.

He took his coat from the coat rack next to the door.  
It only took him a minute to get ready. I followed him outside his office back to the lobby.  
Once again, we received strange looks. Personally, I thought that it wasn't because I was alive. More because the Holmes brothers alked next to each other without fighting.  
But I didn't care anymore.  
I was on my way to my only friend to tell him I was still alive.  
And I had Mycroft with me. Sometimes it's nice to have family...

**Author's note: Hi! Thanks for reading and sorry for the fluff. I just couldn't resist it. It was too cute to leave it…** **Review, keep reading and promote this story if you want: I could use some more readers ;) **


	3. GHOST!

John's POV

_One year after 'his' death. One year to the day that I lost my best friend.  
But I moved on… or so people think. _

I was walking from my job at the hospital to my apartment. I had moved their quite quickly after 'the fall'. Today, I had taken a half day of, because I knew I wouldn't be able to concentrate at all. When I came home, I changed my clothes into something more comfortable and checked my cell phone. Two new messages. 'That's strange', I said. I barely got any texts at all. And now two in one day?

I opened the first one. Molly Hooper. 'I'm right here if you need me. Everything will be alright'.  
I smiled. She remembered to. She had been heartbroken after 'he' died. Had barely spoken at all for a month. And if she did, it was with guilt written all over her face. I replied with a simple thank you. Sometimes, you just don't need a lot of words.

The second message was from Greg Lestrade. Weird, he hadn't send me a message in 2 months.  
'Do you have a moment? I need to talk to you. Pub next to the library at 3pm?' I looked at the time. 1pm. I replied I would be there and decided to go on foot, so I could focus on something else then… a certain person.

While walking, I thought about Greg's words. 'I need to talk to you'. _What could he want to talk about? A new case? Family problems? Well, I'll find out soon enough. _

When I arrived at the library, it was only 2.30. So I walked into the library and decided to read the newspaper.  
I was sitting in a comfy armchair in the most remote part of the library, when I heard voices.  
But not just any voice. Two voices I would recognise anywhere.  
One bossy voice with a slight implication of annoyance.  
And the other one… A deep baritone voice I thought I would never hear again.

I put the newspaper down and walked over to where the sound came from.  
When I had reached the place, I couldn't believe my eyes. There they were standing, whispering to each other. The Holmes brothers. Mycroft and … Sherlock. Slowly I walked backwards and as soon as they were out of my sight, I turned around and started running while yelling the same thing over and over: 'GHOST! THERE IS A GHOST!'

Once outside, I ran into Lestrade. 'Greg, you have got to come with me!' I yelled at him while pulling his arm. He only gave me a very confused look. 'What's wrong, John?' He asked carefully.  
'What's wrong?!' I replied 'I'll tell you what's wrong! THERE IS A GHOST IN THE LIBRARY! I AM FREAKING OUT!'

Lestrade tried to calm me down, but to no avail. But he still kept trying: 'Calm down, John. Everything is going to be alright. Everything is ok.' 'NO, IT'S NOT OK!' I yelled angrily.  
Greg jumped back a little from surprise. It was seldom that I lost my self-control.  
'Ok, it's not ok', he agreed 'but tell me: what's not ok?' 'I have seen Sherlock Holmes in the library talking to Mycroft Holmes. I have totally lost it now!' I really started to panic now. It took all of the self-control that I had left to keep myself from hyperventilating.

When I looked back at Greg, he was looking at me a little guilty. Then, I grew suspicious. 'What did you want to talk to me about?' I asked. I started to get a feeling… and I didn't like it. 'Well,…' He started, but he was interrupted with another voice. 'John!' I turned around and saw Sherlock running from the library to me. Behind him Mycroft who was walking as calm as ever.

I turned to Greg again: 'Do you see them to?' He nodded slowly.  
When I turned around again, I was face to face with 'the ghost of Sherlock'.  
'Hello John', he said to me 'I'm alive' He smiled after this statement.  
By this time, Mycroft had caught up with him and was just standing next to him.

I looked at the three people surrounding me.  
Then, everything got dark.

Lestrade's POV

I saw John falling. Thanks to my reflexes, I was able to catch him before he hit the pavement.  
You wouldn't say so, but John is quite heavy. I slowly put him down on the ground and slapped his face a little. But it didn't help a lot.  
I looked at the two persons who had caused this reaction. They both had the same startled expression on their face. But Mycroft quickly hid it. Sherlock though kneeled down next to John and tried to get him to wake up.

I sighed and put my hand on Sherlock's shoulder: 'You always need a big entry, don't you?'

**Author's note: A very special thanks to my English teacher for this chapter! :D  
Sir, if you read this: no offence, I just liked the idea :)**

**Keep reading and reviewing! **


	4. Fight

John's POV

The last thing I remember was seeing Sherlock and Mycroft standing in front of me. Then, he told me that he was alive. And after that… Black.

I felt myself falling, but the impact never came.  
_Have I just died from a heart attack? No, I feel someone slapping my cheek. Lestrade? Probably. Then, someone else slapped my face. Someone with colder hands and thinner fingers…  
Then, I heard Lestrade saying something about a big entry… What the heck is he talking about?! I really should wake up… _

Nobody's POV

After a little while, John opened his eyes. He looked around him with a dazed look on his face, like he was trying to find out where he was. And more importantly, how he ended up on the pavement surrounded by three people. When he looked up, he looked right into the face of Lestrade. 'Welcome back, John', Lestrade said with a small smile 'You scared us, man!' John smiled back, but then thought about what Lestrade had just said. _Scared us? Who is 'us'? _

When John looked to his other side, he saw a very familiar face. A face that he thought he would never see again. 'Sh… Sherlock?', John managed to whisper. It had been a year since he had pronounced the name and it sounded weird to hear it again. But Sherlock smiled and nodded: 'yes, John. It's me. And I am so sorry for scaring you like that. This wasn't supposed to happen…'

Then, John got angry. And not just angry, but furious. Before he knew what he was doing, he jumped on his feet and lunged at Sherlock. He was on top of Sherlock while hitting him in the face and on the chest. Sherlock was just too startled to react. While hitting him, John yelled: 'HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?! YOU MADE ME WATCH YOUR OWN SUICIDE! AND NOW YOU COME BACK TELLING ME THAT IT WAS A TRICK?!'

It took a while before Mycroft and Lestrade could react. When they finally did, they tried to get them apart. After a while, they succeeded. Lestrade held John back while Mycroft helped Sherlock to his feet. All the time, John kept shouting.  
Then, all of a sudden, he stopped. He didn't say another word for about a minute. But Lestrade still hold his arm, just in case.  
Mycroft was checking on Sherlock. Except some bruises and a bleeding nose, he was fine.  
Then, Sherlock walked over to John. 'John..', he said pleadingly 'Please… Just listen to me…'

John looked at the pavement and then back at Sherlock. 'You know what, Sherlock?' he said 'I defended you. The entire media said you were a fake. The entire world called you a freak. But I believed in you. I never believed that you were a fake, not even for a second! Not even when you told me yourself. But now,… I really don't know why I went through all that trouble for you, if you didn't even trust me enough to let me in on your plan. I thought we were friends!' John had tears in his eyes by now.

Sherlock looked at him with big eyes. He felt his heart break when he heard John said that. The pain is voice was hurting him physically. '…We are friends! You're my best friend!' Sherlock tried desperately to save the situation. He looked at Mycroft. When he saw his face, he knew that they were thinking the same thing: _This… is not good. _

John shook his head: 'No, Sherlock. Donovan told me from the very first day: You don't have friends.'  
Then, John turned around and just walked away without looking around again.

The other three men were baffled. They had expected anger or sadness, but this… No, definitely not this.

Sherlock looked as he was going to cry. Lestrade put a hand on his shoulder: 'He will come around. Just give him some time'. Even Mycroft tried to comfort his little brother: 'John is a wise man. I just know that he will make the right decision. Everything will be alright in the end'.  
He hated seeing his little brother so sad. He just wanted Sherlock to be happy, even if that gave him a lot of trouble.

But Sherlock looked at the ground and shook his head: 'No. John… is gone'

**Author's note: Thank you so much for reading! I know this is very sad, it hurt me physically to write it. I hope you liked it! Read and review! **


	5. Thoughts

John's POV

I have fought in a war. I have seen people getting killed. Innocent, good people.  
People who would give their life to protect others… which they did.  
But what Sherlock did…  
I don't know why he did it and I don't even know if I even want to know.

But he faked his own suicide… He made me watch… He just… left me.  
Without any reason.

At first, I felt guilty. I thought I was a bad friend. He didn't trust me enough to let me in on his feelings…

I always thought that if he would return, if he would give me my 'miracle', I would be incredibly happy and wanted to hug him. But today…

I have never felt so much anger! I just wanted to hit him and break all of his bones.  
If Lestrade and Mycroft hadn't been there… I don't know what would have happened.

Now I think about it… Why did Lestrade want to talk to me? He said that he needed to talk to me… Wait a minute! He knew! Sherlock went to him before he came to me? Wow, that's rude! I mean, I thought I was his friend! Clearly not…

But Mycroft was there to. Was he in the complot? No, it can't be. Mycroft doesn't do emotions. Ever.  
But at his 'funeral', he looked sad. And guilty. He believed he had given Moriarty the perfect ammunition to take Sherlock down… Ok, I made him feel that way, but it was true!

But…he really looked like he cared. Right after the funeral, he left and I didn't see him again until today. But I have to admit that's it's refreshing to not get kidnapped every week by a black car…

So, Sherlock went first to Scotland Yard, a place that is filled with idiots according to him. Then, he went to see his brother who he would like to punch in the face most of the time. And after that, he considered telling me…

Wow, I am really starting to feel left out here…

II doubt if Sherlock will give up. I think he will keep trying to get my attention and talk to me.  
So I can forgive him… again. And he can be the genius and I the dumb sidekick…again.

But not this time… I don't care if I never see him again.  
No, I absolutely don't mind being lonely all the time!  
It's not like I miss the good old days when he would drag me around London at 3am in the middle of the winter…  
No, I am perfectly happy with my life the way it is…

Right?

Sherlock's POV

Normally, I am all for 'not talking about emotions'. I hate showing how I feel and making apologies.  
But now,… I really wish that I knew how to make it up to him…  
I can tell that Lestrade and Mycroft feel bad for me.

Lestrade put his hand on my shoulder and tried to make me feel better. Heck, even Mycroft tried.  
It didn't help.

Me and John had been in more fight than I can count... and I remember almost everything! I lost count at 256

But I have never seen him this angry! His punches didn't just hurt because he was strong for his length. It had more behind it. Frustration, hurt, sadness,… But nothing hurt me more than the look in his eyes. Even though he didn't say it, I could read it from his face: 'How could you leave me like that?'

It hurt me more than I would ever admit out loud. But I knew Mycroft could see right through me. 'John is a wise man. I just know that he will make the right decision. Everything will be alright in the end'. I was surprised at his words. It had been since our childhood that he had comforted me… or at least tried.  
Then, I had to admit what all of us knew. 'John… is gone'  
I could feel the tears burning behind my eyes, but I refused to break down.

Then I felt Mycroft pulling my arm. I turned around and looked him in the eyes.  
'Sherlock', he said. His voice was so breakable… not the usual stern voice that started wars and controlled the country. No, this wasn't the voice of a leader… this was the voice of a brother.  
He continued: 'I would do everything within my power to get John back. But we both know that it would only make things worse… If he says that it's over… I don't think there's anything we can do about it… I'm sorry'

I nodded. I didn't like to admit it, but he was right.

Maybe it is over…  
But I won't leave without a fight. I will fight for our friendship.  
Because no matter what John said, we are friends. From the moment he shot the cabby the first day we met until the day I jumped… We have always been friends… He was, and is, my only friend.

And I will try everything to make him remember that…

**Author's note: I'm sorry for the extreme late update! Busy with school (test, exams, assignments). I know, again sad! But it will get better… probably… eventually… hopefully…**


	6. Intruder!

Nobody's POV

Sherlock kept his promise. With some help fro Mycroft, he found John's new address. He had been walking in the street for about 20 minutes now in the hope of seeing John come out of his apartment. But John stayed inside.  
Sherlock sighed and walked over to the front door. He ringed John's doorbell, but he didn't open his door. _Come on, John! Don't be so stubborn!_, Sherlock thought. He tried the doorbell right below. A female voice answered: "Hello?" "Hello", Sherlock replied "I'm here for mister Watson. But he told me his doorbell was broken so I should try the one right underneath. He assured me that the beautiful young lady who lived there would be kind enough to let me in". The woman giggled and buzzed him in. "Thank you", Sherlock said _you idiot_, he thought behind it.

When he stood in front of the door with 'J.H. Watson' Written next to it, he stood still. He felt his heart beating fast. His hands were sweating. He didn't understand. Normally, he wouldn't let himself be controlled by stupid things like emotions. But now…

He sighed and knocked. It was quiet inside. He tried again. Still no response. Then, he faintly heard something. But it didn't sound like John. It sounded like a struggle…  
Sherlock's eyes grew big. A struggle?! He tried to open the door. Locked from the inside. _But John never locks his door, except at night! What is going on here? _ He tried again but the door wouldn't open.

Then, he heard a loud crash. Now Sherlock really started panicking. _Sorry for the door, John _ he thought before trying to kick in the door. He succeeded after the second try and looked around in the apartment. Except for the wood that now lingered all over the floor, it was tidy and nice. _Boring_, Sherlock thought.  
Then, he heard another crash. It seemed to come from the other side of the apartment where he assumed the bedroom was. He ran through the kitchen straight to where the sound came from.  
When he finally had reached the bedroom, he couldn't believe what he saw: John was lying on the ground with his back to the wall, his left arm covered in blood. In front of him stood a blond man completely dressed in black with a knife in his hand and a gun in the pocket of his pants.

'Hey', Sherlock yelled 'Leave him alone!' The man turned around and smiled mischievous. 'Well, well. Look who isn't so dead after all…' Sherlock froze up. He knew he should have double checked if he really had destroyed the entire net of Moriarty before he returned! But he had been so desperate to see John again…  
'The name's Sebastian Moran. Moriarty's second in command', he said 'And before you ask, I'll tell you why I'm here. Before Moriarty destroyed you, he made me swear that if somehow you wouldn't be dead after that jump and you would ever return, I should take John down to destroy you anyway. So that's exactly what I'm going to do. And since you're here anyway, you can watch him die for yourself!' He wanted to take his gun from his pocket, but Sherlock was faster. He jumped on top of him and tried to grab the gun from him.

All this time, John had been lying on the floor holding his arm. He had been watching and listening the entire time. _What is he talking about?_, he wondered.  
When he saw Sebastian reaching for his gun, he got scared. He already had been so lucky to survive one gunshot. But enough luck to survive a second? Nobody had that much luck…

Sherlock and Sebastian started to fight for the gun and John felt like he should help Sherlock. Even though he was angry, he didn't need him to die so soon after he had returned.

So he stood up, trying to block out the pain and jumped Sebastian from the back. He had clearly not expected this and fell back. Sherlock pinned him down while John grabbed the gun from his pocket.  
'John, would you be so kind to call Lestrade?', Sherlock asked.  
John nodded and went to grab his phone from the kitchen table.

While he was calling, he heard Sherlock yell his name. He ended the phone call and ran back.  
The only time he had been so filled with fear was when he had seen Sherlock on top of the roof.  
Sherlock was lying on the ground, while Sebastian had his foot on Sherlock's thorax. In his right hand he held another gun, but bigger than the first one. 'You didn't really think that I would just take one gun, would you?' He said with an evil voice.

Sherlock looked at John. His eyes spoke of one thing: HELP!...

Then Sebastian pointed the gun straight at Sherlock's head, right between his eyes.

And all John could do, was watch…

**Author's note: And… Cliffhanger! :D I like writing cliffhangers! Don't you like cliffhangers? 'Cause I do! ;)  
Sorry, couldn't resist. I know the story took an unexpected turn. Even I didn't expect it! I was writing and writing and suddenly there was a gun! And then another one!  
No idea where they came from…**

**Anyway, you know what to do! Read and review!**


	7. Too late (?)

Lestrade's POV

When John called me, I expected hi mto be angry with me that I hadn't told him that Sherlock had returned before he found out himself.  
But he wasn't angry. Quite the contrary, actually. He sounded incredibly scared!

He told me that there had been a break-in in his apartment and that the burglar had threatened to kill him. He had used a knife to cut his arm and wanted to stab him in the chest when Sherlock ran in.  
Eventually they had managed by working together (I barely could believe my own ears: that soon working together again?!) to get him down.

I asked how his arm was, but he just said that I had to get there as soon as possible, preferably with a weapon and some handcuffs.  
Then, I heard Sherlock scream John's name.  
Not like he needed something, like most of the time. But more like he was in trouble and needed help. John hung up after the scream.

I ran to John's apartment as fast as I could. Even though I had a day off, I never leave my house without my gun. While running, I called Donovan and told her to get to John's apartment asap. And to bring handcuffs and maybe a gun or something like that. I was thankful that she didn't ask any questions and just did what I asked.

I was happy that I hadn't been very far from John's apartment, but still… this showed how much of my condition I had lost during the time Sherlock was 'dead'.

After ten minutes of running, I reached his apartment. At the same time, Donovan arrived with a police car. She nodded and showed the handcuffs and the gun she had brought. Together, we opened the door and ran up the stairs (thank you John for giving me that key in case of emergencies!)

From the moment John gave me the call until the moment that I was running up the stairs, I could only think of one thing: I hope I'm not too late….

**Author's note: I'm sorry for the incredibly short chapter! :(  
I guess I just like to use cliffhangers for as long as possible ;) **

**I hope you liked it anyway :) **

**Keep reading, review and send me a PM if you have ideas, suggestions, questions,…**


	8. Gunshot

Nobody's POV

John saw the man pointing the gun at Sherlock's head.  
He saw the scared look in Sherlock's eyes.  
But he couldn't move.  
Vaguely, he heard footsteps on the background. _I hope that's Greg_, he thought.

Then, John heard a gunshot.

He couldn't bring himself to look at Sherlock. He had already seen his friend 'dead' once, he couldn't face it again. He felt his legs give out and he fell on his knees on the floor.  
He didn't cry. He barely moved at all. He just looked at the ground.

"John?", Lestrade said. He kneeled down next to John and put his hand on his shoulder "are you okay?" John looked up at him. Lestrade's eyes were filled with worry for John.  
"Is he…", John just couldn't say it. Not again. Not so soon after he had returned…

Lestrade took a moment to find his words and then answered: "He's not dead, but he's hurt. We will take him to the hospital and when he's recovered, we will arrest him for burglary and attempted murder"  
John looked confused: "What? Why would you arrest Sherlock?"

Lestrade was quit, but then started laughing: "I'm taking about the burglar, John!"  
John was relieved, but then started panicking again: "But I heard the gunshot! Then who…"  
"I was the one who shot", Lestrade interrupted him "When I entered, I saw the man ready to shoot Sherlock. And because I had my gun in my hand, it was just a matter of reflexes"  
"If you were the one who shot the burglar… then, how's Sherlock?", John asked.

"I'm fine, John".  
John looked up and saw Sherlock standing in front of him. He looked perfectly fine.  
John sighed and smiled. When Sherlock offered him his hand, he took it willingly.  
Because of the blood loss, he got a little dizzy. But Sherlock was prepared and caught him under the arm before he could fall down.  
"Lestrade, go get the first aid kit from John's bedroom", Sherlock ordered. Lestrade nodded and ran to John's room. Sherlock led John to the couch and put him down there. He helped John pull out his sweater, so the only thing remaining was his T-shirt.  
Lestrade returned and handed Sherlock the box. After that, he went to Donovan to help her with the burglar.

While Sherlock cleaned and bandaged the wound, none of them spoke. It was only when Donovan and Lestrade had left that Sherlock spoke up: "I'm sorry John." He sat down on the couch next to John and looked him in the eye.  
John looked surprised. Sherlock barely ever made an apology. "Sorry for what?", John asked.  
"For everything", Sherlock answered "for not telling you, for attracting a burglar that tried to kill you, for scaring you that I almost died for real this time, for breaking your door,… Just everything"

John let this sink in, but then looked at his front door that was now on the floor: "You know you have to buy me a new front door right?" But he smiled when he said that. Although he was still a little angry, Sherlock had saved him once again.

Sherlock nodded, but then continued: "I know I can't ask you to forgive me or to come back to solving crimes with me. I just hope that one day, you could forgive me and that things may be back to the way they were"  
John looked straight into Sherlock's eyes. They showed fear. Fear that John would say that he would never forgive him. Things John normally would have said.

John took a deep breath: "I think we both know that things can't go back to the way they were".  
"I understand", Sherlock looked at the floor. John gave him a little smile: "But things can be better than the way they were before"  
Sherlock looked up and saw John smile, which made him smiled in return: "So do you mean…"  
John nodded: "I forgive you and I will solve crimes with you again"  
Sherlock smiled: "Thank you".

He gave John a firm handshake, but John pulled him into a hug with his good arm.  
At first, Sherlock was a little startled. But then, he relaxed and hugged him back.  
After a while, John pulled back, but held his hand on Sherlock's shoulders: "But if you ever do something like that again, I will kill you!"  
Sherlock grinned: "good"

John put his hands back on his lap. Both of them were quiet for a moment.  
Then, John spoke up: "You know, Sherlock, I still need an explanation."  
Sherlock sighed, but agreed: "But it's a very long story"

**Author's note: Hi ! Thanks for reading :)  
Sorry for the fluff (again)  
You know what to do! R&R! :D**

**It's a little late, but still a very happy new year! :D  
May all of your dreams come true :)**


	9. Why?

Nobody's POV

"… And that's how I did it and where I have been this past year", Sherlock ended his story.  
John had sat across him for about an hour and looked at him with a look of complete concentration.  
When Sherlock was done, he stood up and walked to the other side of the room. He stood there for a moment with his hand against the wall looking into nothingness.

Then, he turned around and looked at Sherlock: "One thing you have to explain to me, Sherlock"  
Sherlock nodded. John continued: "Why…"  
"Why haven't I told you anything? Why have I told you that I was a fraud?", Sherlock interrupted.  
John grinned: "No, I know those things" Sherlock smirked a little: "Really? Well if you're so sure of that, explain it to me."  
John smiled: "Fair enough" He walked over to his favourite armchair and sat down: "You didn't tell me anything because you thought that I would blab in all of my enthusiasm. So in fact, you didn't trust me enough. And why you told me you were a fake? Simple: sentiment"

Sherlock looked stunned: "First one: yes, true. Very good! And sorry for that. As for the second: sentiment? Me?! Never!"  
John shaked his head and grinned: "Yes, sentiment! You believed that if you could convince me that you had been lying the entire time to me as well as to the world I wouldn't grieve at all or just a little. You tried to make me suffer less. You thought I would just be angry… But you were wrong. And, just to clarify something, I never believed a word you said! Not even for a second… I knew you for real… and I still do"

Sherlock smiled: "Ok, fair enough. You are right. That was my intention indeed. But clearly I failed… And I'm happy I did"  
"So am I", John replied.  
"But, if none of those questions was your question… What did you want to know?"  
John sighed and looked at the ground: "You really don't know anything about the human nature, do you?"  
"Human nature?... Nope", Sherlock replied. He meant it, he had no idea what John wanted to know from him. But not a single cell in his body thought about admitting that.

John looked back up: "I want to know why you first went to see Lestrade, Misses Hudson and even Mycroft before you considered coming to me"  
Sherlock looked at the ceiling. _I really should clean that…_  
"Sherlock", John's voice was stern by now. The voice he probably had used when he was in the army.

Sherlock sighed and tried to collect his thoughts. Then, he took a deep breath and said it so fast it sounded as one big word: "I'm extremely sorry but I didn't dare because I feared that you had moved on with your life and that you never wanted to see or speak to me again and that I would go back to being lonely and depressed like before I met you"  
But John had understood every last word of it and was genuinely startled. He had known that it had something to do with emotions, but to get such a statement from his best friend… Definitely not what he had expected.

When he had come over his shock, he stood up and kneeled in front of Sherlock. He put his hands on Sherlock's knees to gain his attention.  
When Sherlock finally dared to look him in the eyes, John spoke: "I assume you heard my little speech at your grave. But I'll still repeat it: you were the best man and the most human... human being that I have ever known, and no one will ever convince me that you told me a lie. But I'll take your insecurity as a compliment. And since I think you have never been so honest with anyone in your life, not even yourself: thank you for trusting me after all"  
John smiled and at seeing this, Sherlock smiled to.

John put his arms around Sherlock's neck and pulled him into an embrace. This time, Sherlock didn't argue, but just gave in and hugged back. After a little while, Sherlock spoke up: "You know that Lestrade still needs a witness report from you about the burglary right?"  
He heard John groan: "I don't want to…" Sherlock smirked: "… Maybe you won't have to…"

John pulled away and looked at Sherlock: "What you're thinking of?"  
Sherlock winked and took his phone from his pocket. He pressed a number on speed dial and waited a little.  
When John heard Sherlock talk to the other person, he started laughing uncontrollably.  
Because he had heard that openings sentence before: "Hello brother dear, how are you?"  
The response made both John and Sherlock almost fall of the couch from laughter: "What do you need now, Sherlock?"

**Author's note: I'm soooo sorry for the extreeeeeme late update. I've been a little busy with all kinds of things. Anyway, there will be one more chapter with some spoilers for '**_**The sign of three'**_**. So a warning on beforehand. In case I forget later, already loads of thanks for anybody who might read this :) You have no idea how much that means to me! :D  
Already a special thanks to: **_**Elleke hihi**_** and my English teacher for chapter 3.  
Sir, again: if you read this: I don't mean any harm by writing this. No offence, I just liked the idea you unconsciously gave me :) So, thank you :) **


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